Moje ime je Ciera in prihajam iz Združenih držav Amerike. Prihodnje tri mesece bom preživela v Ljubljani, medtem pa bom opravljala pripravništvo na Slovenskih novicah. Če povem na kratko: moja naloga je ustvarjanje tega bloga, v katerem bom interpretirala svoja doživetja. Na podlagi dozdajšnjih izkušenj sem prepričana, da bom lahko z vami delila marsikatero zanimivo zgodbo.
Že ob prihodu v slovensko prestolnico sem se spopadla z nekaj težavami. Za eno od teh je vzrok v mestu, v katerem sem odrasla. V zadnjih dveh tednih sem se namreč naučila uporabljati ljubljanski avtobusni promet. Mislim, saj ni tako zapleteno, vendar sem to počela prvič. Namreč tam, od koder prihajam, lahko z enega konca mesta na drugega pridete peš v pol ure. Na drugi strani pa je tako rekoč vse, kar se mi je do zdaj zgodilo, povezano s tujo kulturo. Imela sem nekaj malce manj prijetnih izkušenj, iz katerih pa sem se nekaj naučila. Naj razložim na primeru.
Zadnjič sem hodila po ulici in naproti mi je prišla ženska. Najina pogleda sta se srečala. V večini držav Amerike imamo nenapisano pravilo, ko se to zgodi, četudi gre za popolnega neznanca, se mu nasmehneš. Če tega ne storiš, bodo mislili, da si »nataknjen« in zloben. In tako sem zadnjič, ko sem hodila po ulici, zadovoljila svoje kulturne zahteve in se nasmehnila mimoidoči. Vse, kar sem dobila nazaj, je bil neverjetno zmeden pogled. Seveda sem se še naprej nasmihala ljudem. Po nekaj vrnjenih zmedenih pogledih pa sem se ozrla okoli, kaj ljudje storijo, ko se srečajo s pogledi neznancev. Nihče se ni nasmehnil. Kasneje sem se pogovarjala o tem z znancem, ki mi je pojasnil, če to pri nas pomeni prijaznost, v Sloveniji pomeni nekaj malenkost drugačnega. Da te oseba zanima, da bi se rada, denimo, celo spoznala z njo. Ups! Nenadoma so zmedeni pogledi dobili smisel. Nehote sem nič hudega slutečim ljudem na ulici dajala napačne signale. Te dni se trudim ne smehljati, a se zaradi nekaj več kot 20-letnega kulturnega pranja možganov včasih spozabim.
Zatorej, če na ulici srečate rdečelasko, ki se vam nasmiha na postajališču za avtobus ali v kavarni, se ne razburite – zelo verjetno sem jaz. Vsak dan spoznavam kulturne razlike in menim, da je to dobro zame. Spoznavam, da kultura ne more biti ovira, da bi se spoznavali. Vse, kar moramo početi, je biti pozoren in se učiti od ljudi okoli nas. Morebiti pa bodo te kulturne razlike tisto, kar bo med nami stkalo močnejše vezi, namesto da bi nas oddaljile. Vsekakor pa, če me srečate ne ulici, se vam vnaprej opravičujem za nasmešek. Ne obotavljajte in mi odzdravite. Lahko tudi z nasmeškom.
Angleški izvirnik
Lesson #1: Don’t Smile at Strangers
It’s interesting what living in a new place can do for your mindset. Simple, common experiences in a new place have the ability to reshape and expand our thought horizons in ways that those same experiences in familiar places never could. In just two weeks of living in Ljubljana, I have definitely experienced some of this remolding.
My name is Ciera, and I’m from the United States. I’m living in Ljubljana for the next three months while working as an intern for Slovenske novice. In a nutshell, my job is to write this blog, and my goal is to give an honest interpretation of my experiences over the course of my time here. And based on what I’ve experienced so far, I’m sure that I’ll have lots of interesting stories to share.
There are several difficult things that I’ve experienced since coming to Ljubljana. Some of them, though, are just because of the town I grew up in, and not necessarily because I’m from a different country. For example, in the last two weeks I learned how to ride the bus. (I mean, I guess it’s not that complicated, but I’d never done it before.) Where I’m from, I can walk from one end of town to the other in about thirty minutes—we don’t really need buses there. However, other things I’ve experienced have everything to do with the fact that I’ve stepped into a foreign culture—and I’ve had some educational (and slightly uncomfortable) experiences to show for it. I’ll give you an example.
The other day I was walking down the street, and I made eye-contact with a woman that was walking toward me. Now, in most places in the U.S., we have an unspoken rule: if you make eye contact with anyone, even if he or she is a complete stranger, you smile. If you don’t smile, people will think you’re grumpy and mean. So, the other day as I walked down the street, I did as my culture demands and smiled at this woman. All I got in return was an incredibly confused look. Of course, though, I kept on smiling at people. After a few more confused (and in some cases, annoyed) looks, I stopped smiling, and started watching what the people around me did when they made eye contact. No one smiled. I asked someone about it later, and he told me that while smiling at strangers in the U.S. is just a sign of friendliness, here in Slovenia it means something a little different. Here, smiling at a stranger basically means that you’re interested in him or her. It means that you’d probably like to go out and get to know that person better. Yikes. Suddenly the confused looks made sense, and I realized that I had unknowingly given a whole bunch of innocent people on the street the wrong message. These days I’m trying to stop smiling, but sometimes twenty years of cultural brain-washing gets in the way.
So, if you see an unfamiliar red-headed girl smile at you on the street, at the bus stop, or at the café, don’t be alarmed—it’s probably me. I’m still learning a lot of culture differences, and it’s been good for me. I’ve learned that culture is not and should not be a hindrance for our getting to know each other. All we have to do is pay attention and learn from the people around us, and then maybe these cultural differences can be something that enhance our relationships, instead of detracting from them. So if you do see me on the street, I’m sorry in advance for smiling at you. But know that you’re welcome to say hello.
